Christopher Stevens shows off last night’s TV: Plastic Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer for £995! What freedom
Freedom at Christmas
Would I lie to you? in Christmas
The person who invented the scented candle deserves to be dipped in boiling wax and lit. These smoky, dirty, greasy, smelly things need to be banned.
Whatever nonsense is printed on the jar—black cherry, chocolate layer cake—it only smells of cheap molten wax. They are fire hazards, and when they burn, they leave you with a blackened glass beaker that cannot be recycled.
But there will be one in every Christmas sock. And the cost is ridiculous. Freedom at Christmas (C4) saw the luxury store in London’s West End touting agarwood scented candles with a touch of Damask rose at £48 each.
“It’s a great show,” said Chief Marketing Officer Madeline. We don’t want it to be something that no one can afford. Everyone can have a little freedom in their own home.
In 2020, during the lockdown leading up to Christmas, Liberty in London was deemed ‘non-essential’ and forced to close its doors
In fairness to Madeleine, candles are at the budget end of their range. If you have more leeway, why not treat Auntie Flo to a pair of silky pajamas, for just £450.
Some Liberty clients – Adele and Beyoncé – have been mentioned buying a pair for every day of the week. Or, if you’re not done with your decorations, take a plastic reindeer with plush fur, £995.
“They need foreplay,” warned an aide. “You have to take care of them.”
If you’re wondering, plastic Liberty Rudolph is twice as expensive – there’s a place in Manchester that lets you rent a reindeer at £450 for four hours. Which, I think, is just long enough for all the kids to get bored of stroking it.
Perhaps that’s why in 2020, during the pre-Christmas shutdown, Liberty was deemed “non-essential” and forced to close its doors.
rut view of the night:
“I wondered if you wanted to look at a building with me?” Ask Creepy Ed Architect (David Oyelowo) Gene (Gugu Mbatha-Raw) on The Girl Before (BBC1). This should be the modern version of inviting a girl to come see your drawings.
This year, with shoppers staying away from London in droves, employees have been feverish to attract customers. You have to admire the crazy dedication of the window designers, who during the small hours worked five nights in a row to complete the shows, all built of paper.
When it was finished, the teddy bears climbed up a sleigh surrounded by 35,000 envelopes, all of which had to be individually glued.
This seems like a long story out of all the improbable tales, Would I lie to you? (BBC1) – Come back with a special Christmas full of more wonderful stories and events than ever before.
It included one with festive flavor about a cheerful old man who emerged from a snowstorm to hand Ardal O’Hanlon a nut, before disappearing again into the snow.
Ardal, much loved as Dim Priest Dougal in Father Ted as well as de-Jacques Mooney in Death In Paradise, is a natural-born contestant—as seen before on Alan Davies’ talk show, As yet Untitled.
Would I lie to you? It’s a happily funny format, but it highlights the dearth of real chat shows on TV. In an earlier era, Ardal would sparkle in conversation with Barkey or Michael Aspel. There will be no shortage of distinguished guests.
Host Rob Brydon couldn’t believe his luck with Oscar-winning Jim Broadbent and dance news anchor Angela Rippon, who proved that she can still throw a high kick like a girl can.
As always, the game is worth watching just to marvel at the speed of Lee Mack’s ad libs. I guess he can’t control them.
No doubt he sometimes gets in trouble in real life, due to the candid jokes before he can stop himself.
When Jim announced that he had walked the Pyrenees, he flashed back to me, “You walked on two knees!” Explosions!